No Apologies, St. Paul's Church 2011

This is a camp which is themed about the truth of life, love and sex... Its on the 28th-30th of August... But I would not be talking about the whole camp, I will be talking about an amazing thing that happened to me in that camp... You must read this, I'm not kidding! =)
I was given the responsibility to worship lead for the first day of the camp... The first session of P&W is in the morning, so everything went well, except that I forgot to copy the Powerpoint slides into the computer for projection, how careless of me!

But that's not the main point of this testimony...

It all started during dinner time... Me and Christopher were having dinner together, and since we were the camp commanders, we felt that we should go around to have fellowhip with other people... SO we went to a group and sat down with them... So we had small talk here and there... In the end, Chris asked one of the girls there about the P&W session that I lead that morning... That girl was forced by her mother to come and she didn't like the camp at all... So i guess, out of anger, she said that the whole P&W session is terrible! The vocals, the music, she said that its all a mess! I don't know why, I know that I shouldn't care about what they say because what we're doing is to glorify God, but the things she said kept going in circles in my head!

10 minutes before the P&W session starts, I just couldn't take it anymore! I felt pain and sadness in me... I just can't stop thinking that I didn't do well enough for God and that this is my punishment... I went to Peter and Marcus who were my fellow P&W team leaders and tell them that I simply couldn't lead the worship that night...

Without hesitation, they said that they wanted to pray for me, so they both put their hands on my shoulders and started praying... And without warning, I started crying and I can feel the warmth of the presence of the Spirit... So I agreed to carry on with it, but because I just cried, my voice is not stable and I asked Marcus to help me lead the fast praise songs....

So at first, it went smoothly without any problems... And so it came to the slow worship songs that I'm leading...  When it came to the last song, as I open my eyes, I just see and feel that the Holy Spirit is not there... I asked God with a tinge of sadness, "Even after the Spirit touched me, why can't I feel the Holy Spirit's presence among the people?"

Right after I ask that question, immediately.......... BAMM!!!!!!!!! The electricity and the lights went out! And right before that came into my mind, the presence of God HIMSELF was so strong that I was nearly knocked of my feet! And without warning, streams and streams of tears flowed down my face... And God spoke to me... "Why do you care how the people of the world thinks of you? You are singing for Me, not for them! I am THE ONE who anointed you to lead the people... And now, I'm gonna show you My glory!" And what I write right now is all real and I didn't make anything up....

How awesome is our God!

I hope that this testimony will touch you as much as it has touched me... Don't care about how other people think of you when you're doing what God wants you to do... Because what you're doing is for God and God ONLY... No one else!

May God watch over you while you serve God...

God bless!! =)

Lost & Found: Your Mercy Found Me Upon The Broken Road

L&F is an Easter celebration and evangelistic event organized by the Christian Fellowships of Chung Ling High School and Penang Chinese Girls' High School... Its on a Saturday,  23rd of April 2011...

This is really an eye-opening event for me personally... I'm the event coordinator for this event... And you know what's really impossible? Its two weeks right after the Inter-School CF Outing that I appear to be the event coordinator as well... And that's not it... We were so busy planning for the outing that we have forgotten about the Easter event... And we only started our meeting for this two weeks before the event!

You may think that planning this late will create a lot of problems huh? You're NOT wrong...

At first, when we planned everything, it appears to go smoothly... But on a Saturday night, if I'm not wrong, problems started to pop out... The biggest one of all, is that the venue, which is the main hall of Penang Christian Centre, is not available!

We had a Praise and Worship practice and meeting the following day afternoon... That itself is a problem, due to miscommunication, the venue for that, that is also P.C.C. which was supposed to be booked by us, was not booked! But the Lord's grace started to appear, the church keeper said that there is another meeting going on, so we could carry on with our practice, but only until the church board's meeting finishes... Thank God for that! Not everyone attended the practice though, so we couldn't really practice... After that we had our meeting, and problems continue to appear... It turns out that because the venue is not available, we had to totally change our plans... And since we couldn't of another venue to replace the original one, we had no choice but to put it aside first and hope that God will open a way for us...

When the meeting ended, after I went home and had a bath... I was tired sick! I felt like tonnes of weights were crushing me! So I just fell on my bed, and I started praying... I pray to God that this is an event to glorify Him, so I begged Him to take my burdens away and help me solve my problem, 'cos I felt so helpless back then!

But the problems didn't stop there! The next day, my friend called me up and told me that the mics and amps for the Praise and Worship are all insufficient! I almost went crazy hearing that... But still, I continue to pray for miracles  and put my faith in God...

And INDEED, miracles started to occur! On Tuesday night, four days before the event itself, my friend called me up and told me that the main hall of P.C.C. might not be available, but there is a small hall that is! So without hesitation, I told him that we'll take it, 'cos I believe this is God's grace! But the problem with the equipments for the P&W was not solved yet...

So the day of the event came, and we were expecting a hundred people to come... As we went into the hall, that is Nissi Hall, another miracle occured! We found there are more than enough mics and just the right amount of amps needed... How amazing is that?

In the end, only 50 people came, but you know what? I felt that its the Lord's plan 'cos He knows that a hundred people is hard for us to handle... So the event went smoothly and one soul was saved! And at the end I felt that the plan that God prepared for us is even better than the one we had...

P.S. I know that I'm posting this a lil' late, but I'll try to catch up... Be prepared, a lot more is coming your way!!

God Bless~ =)

Disciples' Rules

"This happened on Thursday, June 16, 2011..."


Today, amazingly, God spoke to me...

Recently, we have compulsory classes for 弟子规 (Disciples' Rules) in school... We have to make a 心得报告 (Heart & Experience Report) for our teacher... And we had to make a brief introduction of ourselves in the report...

While I was writing my report, I suddenly heard a voice saying: "You know what? Teachers are humans too! They need the GOSPEL!" I was surprised when that popped up! But without doubt I know that came from Him... So while I was writing my report, I boldly stated that I'm a Christian that loves God really much! Other than that, I also inserted a few small testimonies in the report... And at the end of the report, I blessed the teacher saying:" 原神祝福你 (May God bless you)！"

Even though its just something small to you guys, but to me, its a big leap of faith! Imagine yourself spreading the gospel to your class teacher! Its hard, but it NOT impossible! Remember, TEACHERS ARE HUMANS TOO! They need salvation!

So in the end, I just want to encourage every student out there to spread the gospel to your teachers!

Be bold and have faith!

Inter-School CF Outing 2011

This is just a simple but beautiful testimony that happened on the 2nd of April, 2011....This outing is a joint outing with PCGHS... We planned everything perfectly... But there is one thing that we can't control or plan, that is the WEATHER... The committees fasted and prayed to God that during the event there would be no rain and that the programme will go perfectly...

On the day of the event, when I reach the venue, that is the field of Youth Park, early morning, the weather is beautiful! Not a single sight of heavy clouds! So when everyone (about 50 of them) is there, we started our ice-breakers after the registration... The ice-breakers that were lead by PCGHS were awesome and fun! But, without notice, rain started to fall! So we asked everyone to "evacuate" to the canteen on the other side of Youth Park and bring their belongings there...

After all of us gathered at the canteen, the other committees and my CF advisor came to ask me what should we do now... Honestly, I didn't know at first! But later, Mr Lim, our CF advisor asked me to carry on with the Praise and Worship session... I was worried at first, first because of the very small space, second because there were Malays there, but then, I put my faith unto God and started the Praise and Worship...

Even though all of us were wet from the head to toe, I can still see that they sang their hearts out to God... It was amazing!

After the Praise and Worship session is finished, the rain started to stop... So after we gave them some food to eat, we asked them to go back to the field to carry on with our games as the rain has stopped...

Halfway through playing captain ball, I had to go 'cos I have a match for the PFL Div 2 later on...

Looking back on the event, I felt that even though it rained, its actually better than we expected... the rain actually broke the ice between us and we actually felt closed to each other because of that... I found out that the rain is not a bad thing, but its a blessing from God... It was quite an amazing memory because this event was the first event I ever organize for school CF and it went out great!

So as a conclusion, what I've learned is that, whatever we do, just commit everything into God's hands... God's plan is always better than ours... Never forget that cos, like a father, He would never hurt us... All He wants is for the best of us and His plan for our lives are always better than what we plan for ourselves...

God Bless~~~ =)

Revival!

In GenXtra's camp

The Holy Spirit touched me like never before

And during that time

I kept praying to God

Asking Him to give me a vision

Asking Him what I should do

I prayed and prayed and prayed

And said that I've surrendered myself to Him

Asking Him to use me!

But I didn't get an answer...

Later on

I walked towards the pastor 

And waited as the pastor is praying for other people

Not long after

He came over

He embraced me for some time

And he told me this:

"I see two type of beans...

Red beans and green beans...

They are to grow...

Not only one of the beans will grow strong...

Both will grow strong..."

And then he said:

"You are not only going to lead one ministry,

You are going to lead two ministries...

Accept this with a willing heart..."

After that he walked away to pray for the others...

After that I went back with a heavy heart...

I prayed for a vision...

I got it...

God has answered my prayer...

After that when we got back to church for sleepover...

I talked to Peter, Andrew, Christopher and the others about the vision that the pastor told me...

They told me to be careful...

And they said that if this is what God wants me to do...

He would not only tell me once...

He'll tell me twice or trice...

So after that...

I prayed to God

Asking Him to confirm this with me...

And then I went to bed...

And on the next day...

After the closing ceremony...

The pastor said again that...

Anyone who needs him to pray for them...

To come forward...

So I walked forward and prayed to God...

Not long after...

The pastor came to me...

He touched my head..

And he said:

"I see the Sword of the Holy Spirit...

You are to grab it...

You are to fight the war for God..."

And then the Holy Spirit touched me again and I fell back...

God has told me what I should do...

But I don't know where to start...

But I will continue to pray to God...

For guidance, strength and wisdom...

God is moving...

Now is the time for revival!

Now is the time to stand!

Now is the time to join the Army of God!

Asia for Jesus!

Malaysia for Jesus!

Penang for Jesus!

We, the Revived Army,

Will fight for God!

We shall triumph!

We shall defeat the Devil!

‎Psalms 22:27-28 says:

"All the ends of the earth will remember and turn to the Lord, and all the families of the nations will bow down before him, for dominion belongs to the Lord and He rules over the nations." 

This is GenXtra!

The Generation of Christ - The Revived Army!

Let's all pray for revival in Penang...

Pray that the fire of the Holy Spirit

Will sweep through Penang...

The time has come...

To stand for all we believe in!

Future

Geez, going to the education fair doesn't give me answers, 

It raises more questions!

Sigh....

Dreams.... 

What are dreams to you guys?

Well,

I definitely have my own dreams...

Walking in a hall full of bustling people...

A hall crowded by college and university representatives...

I was walking around...

Trying to find the colleges or academies

That I'm interested in...

I found a few for graphic design:

The One Academy...

Equator Academy of Art...

TARCollege...

La Salle College of The Arts....

Sigh... I love graphic design...

After going through all the colleges for graphic design...

I caught a glimpse of an academy which is kinda interesting...

Why?

It's an academy for fine arts...

An academy for music...

When I walked over to take a closer look...

The guy over there asked me to sit down...

And he began to introduce the academy to me...

I told him that I'm interested in music...

He told me briefly of the music courses there...

And then weirdly...

He started to tell me about their main course

that is Diploma in Theatre....

So I listened to him...

He asked me a few questions:

What instrument do you play?

Do you like acting?

Do you have any experience in drama?

Do you have any experience in MC-ing?

So I answered all of them...

And told him my experiences in performances, drama, music and stuff...

And then he went on and on introducing the academy to me...

And then one comment from him struck me...

He said to me,

"You really have a very high potential in the performing arts!"

That caught me by surprise!

I mean,

I do dream of myself being a performer, singer, actor and all that stuff...

But I've never really thought of actually being one!

After he talked to me to what seems like 20 minutes...

I said thank you and I'll think about it...

And then I walked away...

With burning enthusiasm in me...

I thought to myself,

I actually wanted to be in the world of performing arts!

By now, you must be thinking if which academy would that be...

Well, let me tell you...

It's the Nanyang Academy of Fine Arts...

Yup, you heard me....

Nanyang...

One of the top academies in Singapore...

There is another academy which also have courses on the performing arts...

La Salle College of The Arts...

But Nanyang is still my priority...

Sigh...

I really don't know what to do!

I mean...

It's performing arts!

And my parents never wanted me to be an actor, musician and all those stuff...

They want me to study engineering...

But performing arts and acting is my passion!

I wanna do what I love to do...

Yea...

Maybe when I finish my studies...

My paycheck won't have as many digits as the paycheck of an engineer...

But so what?!

I don't wanna spend half of my lifetime doing what I don't wanna do!

I want to do what I love!

And I understand that doing what you love,

Is one of the greatest pleasures in life!

I've found out that,

Being a performer...

Has always been my dream!

But who am I kidding?

Where would I find the courage to break it out to them?

That I wanna study performing arts, theatre, drama and acting?

They would kill me!

Even if I tell them... 

They would never approve of me...

Who am I gonna be,

in ten years time?

Graphic designer?

Product designer?

Engineer?

Or someone who I wanted to be,

A performer or actor?

I really hope that God will give me an answer,

Who He wants to be...

But at the mean time...

I hope someone would just counsel me on this matter...

Someone to tell me what I should do...

And what I should be doing...

And all I could do right now...

Is pray...

(God help me)

Passion

Went to a church in Sungai Petani with a few youths of our church today.

We've been there for a few times already but not very often.

The last time I went there is already a year ago.

The service starts at 8PM..

So we went there...

Leaded the whole service...

And we had quite some fun over there...

When the service ended...

We had supper with the church members there...

It suddenly struck me that there are so little people there!

There are only 5-6 people from their church,

And we had like 10 people from our church

I was dumbstruck!

Later on...

I went to look at the notice board...

I saw two photos there...

One of them caught my attention...

It's a photo that our youth have taken with their church's youth and children

2 years back when we were celebrating Christmas with them...

There were like so many of them...

But today...

There is only one teenager there...

Only one.

She is around 14 or 15

And she was with us during the Christmas celebration two years back...

Back then..

There were 20-30 of them

Today...

There is only one...

During the praise and worship,

I can see that she, her father and her mother

Were worshiping and praising

Him, our God Almighty,

Passionately...

And that really moved me...

During the service,

Right after the praise and worship,

The girl did the scripture reading...

The mic was not set up properly at that time...

So I went to help her...

After I'm done with it...

She looked me into my eyes...

And I can see the words thank you in her eyes...

I felt really warm with that...

Then after the service...

The girl went to help her father to count the offerings...

I was paying attention at her through the service...

I can see that

Eventhough she has to do all this stuff alone 

Without any youths from her church to help her

She did not show any dissatisfaction

She was WILLING

I was amazed at her passion for God

I was touched

Eventhough all the other people has left the church

She and her family stayed there

Because they know the importance of going to church

The importance of worshipping God

The importance of knowing The Word

Because they know that

God...

Is their way of life

And Jesus is their Salvation!

Through this blog post

To everyone who sees this

I want you guys to know

That I didn't post this for nothing

I didn't post this because I have a lot of free time

In fact, I'm already very tired from today's activities

I didn't even rested ever since I woke up at 7.30 this morning

And it's already 12AM now

I posted this because I wanted to show you the passion of a teenager and her family

Towards Christ

Their passion towards The Word of God

Their passion towards the Love of God

And their passion towards spreading the gospel

And at the same time

I hope that you would just take a few minutes

Just a few minutes

To pray for the churches in Malaysia

Pray that the gospel and the good news

Will spread like wildfire around Malaysia

And pray that the churches will never die

But they will continue growing

Pray for the churches that are facing problems

Pray for the churches that are crumbling

Pray that God will give the leaders of the churches

Wisdom and strength

To rebuild the churches

And also pray for the members

Who never gave up on their church

Pray for them so that their passion towards Christ would never falter

Pray that they would continue to grow in spiritual maturity

And continue to grow towards Christ.

Most of us are fortunate to have a church to go to

A church that has a lot of brothers and sisters in Christ to care for us

To love us.

But think about those that never have the opportunity to hear the gospel

To receive the good news

Those who go to church with only a few members to share the joy with

Even those that didn't have a church to go to.

Think about it.

We as one in the body of Christ

Are RESPONSIBLE to care for each and every Christian throughout the four corners of the world

Yes

WE ARE RESPONSIBLE

If you've never thought about this,

Well, this is the time to know.

This is the time when we do something about it.

Brothers and Sisters,

Let us all pray for the churches in this country

And at the same time

Make an impact on the lives of people

Being the life-changers of our school,

Our community,

Our country,

Even our churches!

Are you guys with me?

Thank you daddy....

I wanna thank both my earthly father and Heavenly Father
For showing the right way
The One Way
That is
"CHANGE"
Towards what
"CHRIST"
Wants me to be

I wanna thank God

For talking to me through my Dad

I have awoken

My long-time slumber

Has finally come to an end

Now I have a new direction in life

Thank you Dad

I Love Ya!! <3

Time to change course baby!

New Leaf

Shackles are free... Bonds are broken...
Freedom

Life...

What is life to me?

I've been treating life

As if its a curse

As if its my enemy

Life...

What is the true meaning of life?

Life is a gift

A gift from above

A gift from God

From this 

Very day

Very hour

Very minute

From this very s.e.c.o.n.d.

I'm gonna live my life to the fullest

Every time

I've made the people around me

Worry about me

About my stupid lil' problems

Well,

From now on

I'm not gonna be so selfish anymore

I will never ever pull people down with me ever again

Every time

When I say I am alone

I've forgotten of the one true friend

Who has never left me

That very friend

is the one and only

Jesus Christ

From this moment

I would live my life to the fullest

I would not waste my precious time tat God gave me

On things that don't really matter

I'm the light and salt of the world

And I would show His love

Through my actions

Through my life

And let myself be a living testimony

Of the love and grace of God

And let the whole world know

The one true God that has never left me

The one true God whose always with me

Guiding me

Through the storm 

And raging seas

From this moment on

I would only live for Him

My God Almighty

People always say that I'm emo

You know what?

Emo is never ever gonna be in my dictionary ever again

Yes

I would still be down at times

But there's nothing I can do about it

So it's better to just

Move On...

And people always say

That I keep my feelings to myself

Well,

This quote in one of my favourite novels will tell you why:

"I always channel my emotions into my work, that way, I would not hurt anyone but myself..."

- Cinna, The Hunger Games -

Now you guys know why...

Anyway

Like I've said

I'm living my life to the fullest now

And I'm living for my heavenly Father

My shackles are off

My bonds broken

I've finally seen

the break of dawn...

I'm finally

FREE

That "Someone"

What I'm feeling right now?

Left out

Rejected

Why can't I find that someone?

The "someone" that I can lean on to?

I'm fragile

I'm weak

But my appearance makes you think I'm not

People think that I'm strong

That I can deal with my problems alone

And still deal with other people's problems at the same time

The truth is

I CAN'T

Most of the time

I actually wanted to cry

But I always compose myself

Not letting myself break down

But its tearing me apart

From the inside out

Every single time

The situation never allow me to cry

The presence of my friends never allow me to cry

So...

EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

I cried alone

Locking myself in my room

Hitting my fist on something

Until the pain takes over my heartache

I've always wanted someone

Someone that understands me

Someone that could tell what is going on with me

Just by looking into my eyes

Someone that would just hug me 

Without saying a word

Someone that would just let me cry my heart out

But no

Non of this is ever gonna happen

I will always be alone

No one by my side

Walking a long and lonely journey

I'm ALONE

Crying myself to sleep

Letting the loneliness

Engulf me

Swallowing me into its abyss

I'm....

ALONE

Hamlet

"To be or not to be, that's the question..."

-William Shakespeare- 

This quote was found in his masterpiece 

"Hamlet"

I FINALLY UNDERSTOOD WHAT IT MEANT

I wonder what situation 

Was Shakespeare in

When he came up with this quote.

So this is my turn 

To ask this puzzling question:

"To be, or not to be...

To love, or not to love... 

That's MY question..."

The Way I Loved You

I WANNA HOLD YOUR HAND

But I couldn't reach for your hands anymore

I WANNA HAVE YOU IN MY ARMS

But you're so distant from me now

Letting you go is

Making me feel so cold

And I’ve been trying 

To make believe it doesn’t hurt

But that makes it worse

See, I’m a wreck inside

My tongue is tied 

And my whole body feels so weak

The future may be all I really need

Even if I fall in love again

With someone new

It could never be the way I loved you

Like a first love

The one and only true love

Wasn’t it written all over my face?

I loved you like you loved me

Like something pure and holy

Like something that can never be replaced

And it was wonderful

It was magical

It was everything I’ve waited for

A miracle

And if I should ever fall in love again

with someone new

It will never be the way

I loved you

Yes, I don't wanna lose you

I still want you

I made a promise to myself

Saying I don't wanna be in a relationship

But I didn't make the promise to God

I say so just so that

I wouldn't hurt you

I'm sorry for lying to you

I hope you see this 

Because this is what i wanna tell you for a really long time

But I kept it in my heart

And I felt that this is the time 

To tell you how I feel about you

Not Good Enough

In my family and friend's 

point of view...

I AM NEVER GOOD ENOUGH

Strength and Self-Believe Are Slowly Seeping Out Of My Soul...

Embrace

Embrace

It captures everything...

There are no need for words...

It is when both hearts connect...

When the other feels what you're feeling...

Sometimes

...I just need a hug...

我。。。

仍然相信拥抱

Chocolates

CHOCOLATES

Numb.
Happiness.
 Energize.
Revive .

...................

 Natural pain-killers

It's simply beautiful

No Boundaries

You Can Go Higher

You Can Go Deeper

Above and Beneath You

There Are No Boundaries...

No matter what situation you are in
Don't give up
There's no telling how far you can go
Even when you fall
You can always just get back up
You can make it through the pain
Just when you think the road is going no where
Just when you almost gave up on your dreams
God will take you by the hand
And show you that you can
He will guide your life through up and downs

There Are No Boundaries

"You'll be surprised on how far you've gone
after going through all the circumstances..."

重生 'Reborn'

Love & Hope

爱也爱过了
疼也疼过了
伤也伤过了
现在我要忘记过去
珍惜现在
把‘现在’成为我的礼物
活出新生命

'REBORN'


"TODAY is a gift, that's why it's called the PRESENT"

TIME TO PUSH MY LIFE TO A WHOLE NEW LEVEL BABY!!!

Broken & Shattered

心疼

困扰

烦恼

这应该是我这几天的人生主题吧

Pain/Pressure

Pain and pressure is what I'm getting at New Year's Day.... No one in this world will ever understand what I'm going through...